Vol. Two: Disclosing abuse and responses
Here we have examined the disclosure of abuse in more detail. As already noted in the previous section, survivors faced systemic barriers to reporting abuse and were met with little if any help if they overcame them. In this section, we have analysed the largely internal barriers to disclosing abuse. They were:
- no understanding that they were being abused no safe person to disclose abuse to
- a sense of being to blame for the abuse and of being ashamed for having been abused
- a fear of the consequences
- a desire not to upset family members.
We also analysed the reported outcomes of disclosure, which were:
- to be labelled a troublemaker or liar to be punished
- to have records altered and processes distorted so no one else
- heard about, or responded to, the disclosures.
Barriers
Thirty-five survivors talked about disclosing abuse, including the barriers they faced. One, as noted already, was the absence of anyone safe to disclose it to. One survivor spoke of the abuse she endured in her foster home and how the only people she could tell were members of her church, which her foster parents were also members of:
“One thing I remember is there was never anybody you could go to for help, except for our church. And when I’ve been thinking about that, that’s actually quite hard to process because [I would] go to church, my parents were elders in the church and they were missionaries, so you know, they were untouchable.”
SARAH, MĀORI, 49
Another barrier was a fear of what would happen after speaking up. Several survivors talked about their fear of possible retribution:
“I was also scared because I knew how strong he was. I knew how scary he was.”
EVANGELINE, MĀORI–EUROPEAN, 27
Some survivors described the types of punishment that resulted from speaking up. These included being beaten up, being threatened, and being subjected to even more severe abuse:
“Four days later, me and a couple of others that made the complaint got locked up and the complaint was thrown under the table while nothing happened.”
TERRY, UNDISCLOSED ETHNICITY, 64
“It didn’t go any further than [name]. He was the assistant principal there at the time … you’d go and tell him so-and- so has been playing with your private parts. Then, first, he tells you to fuck off and then a wee while later, when the fella that’s doing it goes and tells someone else and then you’re getting friggin’ stomped.”
PETER, MĀORI, 50
Some survivors said it never occurred to them to tell anyone because they did not appreciate they were being abused. One survivor, placed in an adoptive home where she was abused but other non- adopted children were not. She said she had contact with a good social welfare officer, she never thought to mention the abuse, which she thought was simply the consequence of being different to the other children:
“We didn’t know it was unfair. We just knew we were different.”
SANDRA, MĀORI, 45
Some survivors talked about not understanding they had been sexually abused until they became older. Some said the presence of family members, typically siblings, in the same State care setting held them back from speaking up. A few did not reveal their abuse until adults.
Some survivors felt a sense of being somehow to blame for the abuse, and it took them some time to recognise that the abuse was not their fault. Survivors also felt ashamed when discussing the abuse. Some had still not told parents or family members. One had still not told his mother in case she blamed herself for having put him into State care:
“I still have trouble trying to mention it to my family. I tried to bring it up to my mother once, but I had seen the way she was starting to think, and that’s why I shut down and dropped the subject.”
CRAIG, MĀORI-PACIFIC, 43
A few survivors had never told anyone about their experiences until contacting the inquiry.
Responses
Some of the survivors said they told someone about the abuse, whether immediate or extended family members, social services, the Police, church figures, friends or a psychologist. Of these, social services, family members and the Police were most common.
Regardless of who they told, follow-up action was very rarely taken. Most who told someone about the abuse said they were not believed and were threatened or further abused. Nothing happened to the perpetrators.
Only one survivor reported abuse that resulted in the charging of a perpetrator. She and her sisters were able to build a case against the perpetrator and the Police acted:
“[He] ended up going to jail. We put him in jail for what he did to me and my sisters.”
SANDRA, MĀORI, 45
One survivor from a boys’ home said he and a group of other survivors went to the Ministry of Health to talk about their abuse. Officials accused the entire group of being dishonest and ignored what they had been told:
“Because they would talk to the nurses and the doctors and everybody like that and, as far as they’re concerned, we were just stirrers and we were trying to tell them what was happening, and they just didn’t want to know.”
TERRY, UNDISCLOSED ETHNICITY, 64
Survivors commonly reported a culture of silence and secrecy in both State and faith-based institutions. They often said staff who witnessed abuse rarely reported it, and staff who did were punished. They said the details they revealed was covered up (including the falsifying of records), survivors were moved elsewhere, and perpetrators were left untouched. Survivors said this reinforced perpetrators’ power over them and sent a threatening message to others:
“If you start causing an uproar with these people, they have the power to just have you removed because they can just falsify reports and say that you’re a disruptive person. And if any accusations about them are made to other wardens, you’re then classified as being a disruptive person and then you’re placed in [another boys’ home].”
NICHOLAS, EUROPEAN, 60
Survivors in psychiatric institutions said the power and standing of psychiatrists, doctors and nurses ensured they were believed over those abused.
Survivors commonly reported being called a liar when they reported abuse, including abuse in previous places of care. Discouraged by such responses, they considered it futile to report abuse any more:
“I did try, once, but I didn’t get believed, you know. What’s the point? It happened so many times elsewhere, so, ‘You’re a liar’ and all that kind of shit’.”
JULIA, MĀORI, 28
One survivor reported abuse, only to be told she was exaggerating and did not understand that physical abuse was a necessary form of discipline:
“So, by the time I hit 14, I rang Child, Youth and Family … and the pastor got in touch with me. He was very angry with me and he said, ‘This is not a physical problem. I’ve got it under control. I will deal with it’ and I was brought into his office and given a severe growling and told that I exaggerated and that I lied and it was very easy to exaggerate when you hear a child being smacked because they are rebellious, and my brother was perceived as really rebellious.”